In my previous post "4 Days" we talked about the quick sale of our house and how we sense God's leading therein. Well that was not the whole story...
Julie and I had been working for a couple weeks on the house to get it ready for sale. There were 8 years worth of little projects we had thought of doing, but never did that were compressed into two weeks time. On Thursday, March 12 our house officially went up for sale and appeared on MLS or whatever it is called. Now our work list was still not complete at this time and we continued working on it even as the sign went up in the front lawn. On Friday our Realtor, Eric Freeman of Pillar Realty contacted us about our first walk-through which was to take place on Saturday evening. Normally people will leave their home during a viewing, giving any prospective buyers a quiet and comfortable setting to view the home. Well, when you have 4 and 7/8 kids, getting out of the home is not so easy. So we planned to go for a walk Saturday evening while the viewing took place.
All day Saturday we spent time finishing up our list and getting the home ready for our first viewing. As 6:30 came close, Julie put some soothing instrumental music on the iPod in the living room and we began getting the crew out of the house and on our way. Well, for those of you who have multiple children, you know this is easier said than done. The two older boys are pretty self sufficient these days in getting their bikes, but Caroline (3) and Ezekiel (16 months) require a little more assistance getting into the double stroller. Add to that the beautiful, talented, and very pregnant Julie whose days of fluid movement have long since passed and you have a very sloooow progression out of the garage, down the driveway and onto the sidewalk...
About 1/3 of the way down the driveway the first car pulls in and I am thinking "oh crap, we didn't make it". Then all of a sudden this (even more pregnant than Julie) woman gets out of her car and we realize it is the other Realtor. She sees Julie and runs up all excited saying, "oh you are almost having a baby too!!!, my due date is actually today and I am showing a house...yada, yada, yada" Anyway, after a minute or two of pregnancy talk, we continue SLOWLY down the drive way and then the second car pulls in with a young couple and an older couple inside...I think "crap, we missed it again"...
As they are getting out of the car while we are walking by, the middle-aged woman says very emphatically, "Julie!!!" Julie then returns the enthusiasm and says, "Karen!!!" They hug each other and feeling very left out at this point and a little confused, I pipe in with "why don't I know you???" Julie then realizes the inequity of the current social interaction and mentions that she used to work with Karen way back 7 years ago when we first moved to our home in Caledonia. We come to find out that Karen's daughter and son-in-law are newly married and are looking for a starter home (like we were at that very same point in our marriage). This is where the real problem begins...
Up until that time I was pretty focused and aware of what needed and didn't need to happen during this first viewing. However, with all of the commotion and reunions going on, I got distracted. Moreover, I began getting too comfortable with all of the chit-chat and warmth that was taking place before our home even got looked at. It was here that the real Jeremy Zilkie began to come out....
Seeing the "coincidences" and obvious peculiarities about the whole viewing appointment I began thinking (very quickly as I often do) and thought I would inject a little humor and light-heartedness into all that was taking place (since I was the one person not presently included in the many varied conversations). Karen happened to say when she looked at a very pregnant Julie and our four children, "boy, you have been busy!" Well this was my opportunity...loving our kids, our family, and thinking that everyone loves some big family humor, I begin articulating the phrase "Be careful, if you buy this place you too could end up with 5 kids in 8 years" However, as I began saying the words some other thoughts crept into my mind...words of sensibility and wisdom...phrases like: What if they don't want a big family? What if they aren't really big on children? What if they can't have children? Is it really worth being witty and a little funny with these people if you possibly offend them and jeopardize their viewing of your home???
Unfortunately this sensibility did not set in until after a couple words did escape from my mouth, the words "Be careful...", and me being me, I didn't exactly whisper them. Well everyone stops and looks at me as I am now silent and realizing what I have just said. Having raised the general curiosity level of everyone present with my provocative statement, one of the members of the buying party says "Be careful about what?" Completely stupefied and without anything to say to try to recover I quickly stammer the words, "never mind..." and leave my "be careful" comment hanging out there all by itself...
Well at this point, to no one's suprise, the conversations have come to an abrupt end and our family began the slooooow march up the street. Yet, my mind continued..."be careful? be careful?" "What did they think I meant? Why would the owner of the home (me) tell them (the prospective buyers) to be careful and then say 'never mind'?" "They must be thinking something is wrong with the house or I am trying to hide something or who knows what?" I begin to feel an ache in my gut as we continue sauntering along the sidewalk. Julie then inquires what I was talking about when I said what I said. Feeling horrible, not wanting to make her anxious and knowing I might as well have left one of Zeke's dirty diapers on the floor of the kitchen during their viewing, I tell her "nothing, don't worry about it", and we continue on. Well I did worry about it for the next 30 minutes, metaphorically kicking myself as we slowly walked around ONE block in our neighborhood as they looked at the house.
Interestingly enough, this whole time Julie is talking about how sure she is they will love the home, how neat it was to see Karen, how she thinks they will make us an offer and they will probably end up buying our home. I on the other hand, though I am smiling and nodding, know in my mind and heart the metaphorical grenade I threw into the evenings festivities. As we walked I just kept thinking to myself what many others have probably thought of me at one point or another, "Jeremy, you Moron! Why couldn't you just keep quiet?"
When we got back to the house they were gone and our evening went on as normal. When we got the call from Eric the next day with an offer, I was TRULY surprised. It had to be a miracle and an act of God for them to overlook my moronic statement and to love our home as they obviously do. So for those of you who saw God in our home selling in 4 days, consider my contributions on that Saturday evening and be even more amazed.
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The Narrow Path
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Saying Goodbye
This past weekend our family visited some friends in Detroit that we had not seen in a long time, over a year and a half. It was great to catch up, see our kids playing so well with their kids, sharing some great food, and reflecting on how much life changes with each passing year. It is amazing to see how our shared bond in Jesus Christ sustains and brings continual life to our friendship with them. We had some other friends from years past stop in on Saturday night and once again, enjoyed seeing all that God does and recognizing how quickly that times passes when you are not looking.
Then on Sunday afternoon we were able to get an impromptu family gathering together with my two sisters, my mom and my grandparents which will probably be our final time seeing them before the move. This also was a very enjoyable time. My sister Katie and brother-in-law Kent are expecting their first child this June and it is wonderful to see them awaiting the little arrival. They are going to be great parents as they have proven themselves caring for their "horse of a dog" Neo, these past years. We are going to miss not being as involved in their child/children as they have been involved in our kids lives these past 7 years. They prayed for us and blessed us with their excitement, sadness, and open-handedness for God's leading in our lives.
My other sister Heather and her family also joined us and have been going through some hard times these past several years. Bob has had some unexpected health problems, combined with the downturn in the economy has had a direct impact on their family's financial well being. In the midst of it all however, Heather and Bob have grown close to God and learned to trust in Him all the more. They are still in serious financial difficulty, but Julie and I are both proud of them and admire the way in which they have handled the struggles they have faced.
My grandparents were/are great, praying for each of our family units before the evening ended. Grandpa is so faithful to pray for and with his children and grand-children and great grand-children. Julie and I are always touched by their prayers for and faith in God's best for our lives. We love them dearly and thank God for such a strong spiritual heritage and diligent prayers on our behalf.
Finally my Mom...who will be giving up her son again 16 years after giving me up the first time when I left for the Marines. We are only traveling to St. Louis, but with her health and traveling limitations, it will be a while before she sees us or her grand-children again. It was so sweet and sad to see her tears as I brought little Ezekiel over for a good bye kiss. My mom and I are so different that it is hard for me to know how she thinks and feels about things, though I know she is sad about our leaving further away than we currently are. Yet our kids will call, write, send pictures, be on the blog...utilize all the technology there is today to keep in touch over long distances.
Julie and I have said "good bye" before and we may have to say it again, who knows? What we are so thankful for is the grace of God by which we may have had a positive and encouraging impact on friends and family's lives during our time together. I have had a lot of "good byes" in my life and each time I remind myself that for those who have chosen to follow Jesus as we have, the wonderful time we have shared here on this earth will just be a down payment for what we shall have for all of eternity once this life is over. This is one of the greatest hopes for a follower of Jesus Christ, that the investment into people will never be lost in a recession or economic downturn. But rather it will grow with compound interest as we pray for, encourage, challenge when necessary, and hold onto the hope of the life to come with all the wonderful "image (of God) bearers" (Gen 1:27-30)whom we have had the privilege to journey this path alongside.
To all of you who read this and are part of this blessed community of brothers and sisters...thank you so much for your involvement in our lives. We do look forward to that day when we will celebrate joyously together without the worry of an evening or setting sun bringing our time to an end.
Then on Sunday afternoon we were able to get an impromptu family gathering together with my two sisters, my mom and my grandparents which will probably be our final time seeing them before the move. This also was a very enjoyable time. My sister Katie and brother-in-law Kent are expecting their first child this June and it is wonderful to see them awaiting the little arrival. They are going to be great parents as they have proven themselves caring for their "horse of a dog" Neo, these past years. We are going to miss not being as involved in their child/children as they have been involved in our kids lives these past 7 years. They prayed for us and blessed us with their excitement, sadness, and open-handedness for God's leading in our lives.
My other sister Heather and her family also joined us and have been going through some hard times these past several years. Bob has had some unexpected health problems, combined with the downturn in the economy has had a direct impact on their family's financial well being. In the midst of it all however, Heather and Bob have grown close to God and learned to trust in Him all the more. They are still in serious financial difficulty, but Julie and I are both proud of them and admire the way in which they have handled the struggles they have faced.
My grandparents were/are great, praying for each of our family units before the evening ended. Grandpa is so faithful to pray for and with his children and grand-children and great grand-children. Julie and I are always touched by their prayers for and faith in God's best for our lives. We love them dearly and thank God for such a strong spiritual heritage and diligent prayers on our behalf.
Finally my Mom...who will be giving up her son again 16 years after giving me up the first time when I left for the Marines. We are only traveling to St. Louis, but with her health and traveling limitations, it will be a while before she sees us or her grand-children again. It was so sweet and sad to see her tears as I brought little Ezekiel over for a good bye kiss. My mom and I are so different that it is hard for me to know how she thinks and feels about things, though I know she is sad about our leaving further away than we currently are. Yet our kids will call, write, send pictures, be on the blog...utilize all the technology there is today to keep in touch over long distances.
Julie and I have said "good bye" before and we may have to say it again, who knows? What we are so thankful for is the grace of God by which we may have had a positive and encouraging impact on friends and family's lives during our time together. I have had a lot of "good byes" in my life and each time I remind myself that for those who have chosen to follow Jesus as we have, the wonderful time we have shared here on this earth will just be a down payment for what we shall have for all of eternity once this life is over. This is one of the greatest hopes for a follower of Jesus Christ, that the investment into people will never be lost in a recession or economic downturn. But rather it will grow with compound interest as we pray for, encourage, challenge when necessary, and hold onto the hope of the life to come with all the wonderful "image (of God) bearers" (Gen 1:27-30)whom we have had the privilege to journey this path alongside.
To all of you who read this and are part of this blessed community of brothers and sisters...thank you so much for your involvement in our lives. We do look forward to that day when we will celebrate joyously together without the worry of an evening or setting sun bringing our time to an end.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
What about Julie???
In the midst of all that is happening, there is a strong dichotomy emerging in our home. Julie and I are both so very excited about the recent developments and what the future holds as we move to St. Louis. The recent activity in our lives and specifically the movement of God on our behalf to clear the path before us is very encouraging and invigorating. Yet with this comes many unknowns and a compressed time table for stuff to happen...and this is where Julie and I head on divergent paths. As a result of the quick sale of our home, the closing date is now set for April 24th. It just so happens that the baby is due April 21st. Additionally, organizing and scheduling movers while trying to minimize costs, hoping the baby doesn't come late, dismantling our home, which Julie has always found refuge in after the birth of our previous four children, all increase the intensity of the 6-8 weeks ahead. For me, this is an adventure and totally energizes me as I look forward to the unknown, what God will do, and how He will provide and show Himself faithful in the month ahead. Then there is Julie...
J
ulie is just as excited and hopeful about the leading of God, however under normal conditions she really enjoys stability and familiarity. She is not much of a risk taker or a thrill seeker. Rather, she is stable, organized, establishes flexible but solid routines in her day and functions wonderfully within them. Since Jonathan, our second child was born, Julie has enjoyed the hospital stay to connect with each child, escape the craziness of the home, especially as that has increased with each additional child. Then when she does leave the hospital, she likes to come home, get a routine with the new baby and settle in for a little while like any mother to a newborn child.
J
ulie is just as excited and hopeful about the leading of God, however under normal conditions she really enjoys stability and familiarity. She is not much of a risk taker or a thrill seeker. Rather, she is stable, organized, establishes flexible but solid routines in her day and functions wonderfully within them. Since Jonathan, our second child was born, Julie has enjoyed the hospital stay to connect with each child, escape the craziness of the home, especially as that has increased with each additional child. Then when she does leave the hospital, she likes to come home, get a routine with the new baby and settle in for a little while like any mother to a newborn child. This time things are different. She may have the hospital time but she does not have a home to return to to "settle in". The baby is due the 20th, we close on the 24th and need to vacate by April 30th. Once vacated, we will drive to St. Louis, and move into a temporary rental home we will probably not have seen prior to arriving. After a couple months we will hopefully have found a permanent place and move all over again. Julie has expressed this desire for security and a refuge with the baby coming, but realizes there will be none. God has opened the door to move us quickly after waiting for over two years. In the process He is removing our earthly security and the previous stability of "our home".
It is not ideal, and I feel her anxiety as an expecting mother, but I also see God challenging her more with this baby than with the previous ones. I am praying for her a ton as she will definitely feel the brunt of our move and this transition. If those of you who read this could pray for her we would really appreciate that. Julie is an amazing wife, mother, homemaker, partner, and friend to me. On one hand, it is hard to see her security removed for the time being and the inner struggle that brings. On the other hand, as her husband and brother in Christ, it is exciting because she has some really cool opportunities to rely on God and grow more deeply in love with Him through the struggles.
It is not ideal, and I feel her anxiety as an expecting mother, but I also see God challenging her more with this baby than with the previous ones. I am praying for her a ton as she will definitely feel the brunt of our move and this transition. If those of you who read this could pray for her we would really appreciate that. Julie is an amazing wife, mother, homemaker, partner, and friend to me. On one hand, it is hard to see her security removed for the time being and the inner struggle that brings. On the other hand, as her husband and brother in Christ, it is exciting because she has some really cool opportunities to rely on God and grow more deeply in love with Him through the struggles.
This is where our present day "Christian" thinking betrays us. Oh, that we as followers of Jesus would more courageously embrace struggles and challenges we face. Not with a complaining or fatigued attitude, but with a winsomeness and joy that has the fragrance of heaven, even though our life might be falling apart around us at that moment. Julie, more than me, has shown this before when her arm was smashed in a car accident at the beginning of her pregnancy with Caroline. She lived through 7 months of a high-risk, bed rest pregnancy without ever complaining once. It was amazing to witness.
James 1:2-3 tells us to "Consider it PURE JOY whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith develops perseverance. And perseverance must finish its work so that you (we) may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
So as we, and specifically Julie, face this next month and the unpredictable, please pray for her, and for me as I support her as SHE walks this narrow road in a manner that she would desire, revealing the grace of God and bringing Him the glory He deserves.
James 1:2-3 tells us to "Consider it PURE JOY whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith develops perseverance. And perseverance must finish its work so that you (we) may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."
So as we, and specifically Julie, face this next month and the unpredictable, please pray for her, and for me as I support her as SHE walks this narrow road in a manner that she would desire, revealing the grace of God and bringing Him the glory He deserves.
Monday, March 23, 2009
4 Days (Updated Fri, 3/27)
This past Thursday, March 19th, our home officially went up for sale. We had our first viewing on Saturday evening, and by Sunday we had received a respectful but low offer for our home. Monday we countered and the buyers accepted our counter-offer. 4 days, 1 showing, an offer agreement and a fair price for both us and the buyer...here in Michigan...
People often talk about "the favor of God". However, in our prosperity focused and suffering averse American Christian society, the idea of God's favor almost always has to do with comfort, ease, success, money, etc. This bothers me. It bothers me because did not Jesus have God's favor EVERY step of EVERY day of His life? Yet, was not Jesus misunderstood, ridiculed, blasphemed, persecuted, beaten, betrayed and ultimately tortured to death? Jesus, the only and most favored Son of the Most High God.
I am very careful to presume to know what the favor of God actually is and who is the recipient of it. Moreover, Julie and I want to walk the path of our Savior, which is a narrow and difficult path, and as trials and challenges come we want to be able to honestly and authentically glorify God and face the struggles with the winsomeness and grace God provides.
Then you have these past 4 days...and the wind of the Spirit has been completely at our backs. To sell your home at a good price, in this housing market, here in Michigan, with a counter offer, in just 4 days is...God's favor? I don't know...
What I do know is that Julie and I have graciously accepted the contrarian's way these past two years. I have worked in a warehouse much of that time, talked of a crazy move to Indiana that never happened, sacrificed a ton materially and financially toward our "long term savings goals", struggled trying to find my path back into "vocational ministry", ultimately led by God to give up my need and pursuit of said ministry job, and yet we have walked in some of the most spiritually fertile ground we have ever known. Moreover, our joy for life, for Jesus, for our family, has only grown stronger in that time.
Oh, one more thing...the baby coming in a month had been breech for some time. Well, at Julie's doctor appointment this (Monday) morning, the baby's head had turned south and all systems are go.
I sit here Monday evening in a fog of sorts, with St. Louis and Rooftop that much closer in just a couple of days. Today as these events were unfolding, four different people: an owner of our company, a coworker, the UPS guy Linc, and my friend in Detroit all made reference to God wanting us to go with His blessing and making the way clear for us. When four (and probably more) different people all testify to the power and activity of God in this world and (by His grace) in my life, I say thank you for allowing me to be a part of what You (God) are doing.
It will not continue like this. The Scriptures say that ALL who will truly follow after Jesus will suffer as He did and we continue to pray that we too could know "the fellowship of His sufferings" (Phil3:10). In the meantime, we adjust our sails, accept the Spirit's wind, and go where He takes us...
(Update 3/27)
...I talked with Eric our Realtor yesterday and asked him if there had been any other inquiries on our home since it went on the market a week ago. We have not yet put the "sold" sign out...NOT ONE ADDITIONAL CALL. One call, one showing, one offer, one pending sale...one God.
People often talk about "the favor of God". However, in our prosperity focused and suffering averse American Christian society, the idea of God's favor almost always has to do with comfort, ease, success, money, etc. This bothers me. It bothers me because did not Jesus have God's favor EVERY step of EVERY day of His life? Yet, was not Jesus misunderstood, ridiculed, blasphemed, persecuted, beaten, betrayed and ultimately tortured to death? Jesus, the only and most favored Son of the Most High God.
I am very careful to presume to know what the favor of God actually is and who is the recipient of it. Moreover, Julie and I want to walk the path of our Savior, which is a narrow and difficult path, and as trials and challenges come we want to be able to honestly and authentically glorify God and face the struggles with the winsomeness and grace God provides.
Then you have these past 4 days...and the wind of the Spirit has been completely at our backs. To sell your home at a good price, in this housing market, here in Michigan, with a counter offer, in just 4 days is...God's favor? I don't know...
What I do know is that Julie and I have graciously accepted the contrarian's way these past two years. I have worked in a warehouse much of that time, talked of a crazy move to Indiana that never happened, sacrificed a ton materially and financially toward our "long term savings goals", struggled trying to find my path back into "vocational ministry", ultimately led by God to give up my need and pursuit of said ministry job, and yet we have walked in some of the most spiritually fertile ground we have ever known. Moreover, our joy for life, for Jesus, for our family, has only grown stronger in that time.
Oh, one more thing...the baby coming in a month had been breech for some time. Well, at Julie's doctor appointment this (Monday) morning, the baby's head had turned south and all systems are go.
I sit here Monday evening in a fog of sorts, with St. Louis and Rooftop that much closer in just a couple of days. Today as these events were unfolding, four different people: an owner of our company, a coworker, the UPS guy Linc, and my friend in Detroit all made reference to God wanting us to go with His blessing and making the way clear for us. When four (and probably more) different people all testify to the power and activity of God in this world and (by His grace) in my life, I say thank you for allowing me to be a part of what You (God) are doing.
It will not continue like this. The Scriptures say that ALL who will truly follow after Jesus will suffer as He did and we continue to pray that we too could know "the fellowship of His sufferings" (Phil3:10). In the meantime, we adjust our sails, accept the Spirit's wind, and go where He takes us...
(Update 3/27)
...I talked with Eric our Realtor yesterday and asked him if there had been any other inquiries on our home since it went on the market a week ago. We have not yet put the "sold" sign out...NOT ONE ADDITIONAL CALL. One call, one showing, one offer, one pending sale...one God.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
A New Chapter - 3/21/09
Today, after 2 years, 4 months, and 12 days since leaving our last church ministry position here in Grand Rapids, Julie and I have excitedly accepted an offer to join Rooftop Community Church in St. Louis as their new associate pastor. Rooftop has close to 300 attendees, 3 staff members including me and to find out more about it, check out the website above.
This journey has been a long and challenging one. 28 months ago I would have had absolutely no idea that God would lead where we have ultimately followed. He truly is the Shepherd, leading his sheep, at least those of His sheep who are willing to humbly trust Him and follow Him, even over dangerous paths and through difficult terrain they would otherwise not want to travel.
The journey to Rooftop alone has been an adventure unto itself, beginning late into the night of October 21st, 2008 after Julie and I were brought to our knees beside our bed in repentance and prayer, experiencing the conviction of our sins and of our self-centered living over the many years prior. In the hour after that time, when I couldn't sleep, the posting for Rooftop first came up on the "ministry position" website I was checking most often at that time. There is much more to that story, which will have to wait for the time being. First, let's take a step back to see where God has led...
Sept 2006 - Express our differing ministry views with previous church employer; mutually agree it is time to part ways.
November 2006 - Leave our church and ministry of 5 years with a grateful heart and hopefully in a fashion that honored them and God.
Winter 2007 - Take a break, visit Utah with family, go to seminary full time for a semester, and get ready for mission trip to Zimbabwe.
April 2007 - Travel with Julie and no kids to Zimbabwe with an openness to serving in Africa full time.
June 2007 - Travel back to Africa with an openness to serving in Africa full time.
July 2007 - Africa is not God's plan at this time, but sense His clear movement in a different direction...south to Indiana.
Summer 2007 - Make plans to move our family to a new "niche" housing development/community.
November 2007 - County in Indiana abruptly and surprisingly rejects previously approved housing plans...housing market crashes 6 months later along with our Indiana plans.
January 2008 - Not sure where to go next, yet continuing to trust God, we began looking for church ministry positions again.
Jan-Nov 2008 -Submitted resumes to over 40 different churches, advanced to final round of interviews numerous times, one of final two candidates several times...yet no offers.
December 2008 - I am freed from the "need" for a church ministry position (which I felt at times) and Julie and I decide to stop pursuing them for our vocation.
January 2009 - Begin making plans for life as lay leader in the church and get excited realizing our best and most fulfilling ministry happened as lay leaders at Kensington Community Church.
February 2009 - Rooftop invites us for interview much to our surprise; we excitedly come and interview, preach in their Sunday service "my message" , and although we enjoyed our weekend, we leave with no assurance or inclination yet of God leading us to Rooftop.
March 2009 - After expressing our uncertainty, Julie and I are invited back to visit Rooftop a second time. This second visit, we stay in a Rooftoppers home for two nights, skip the rental car and are chauffeured wherever we need to go, have a very enjoyable 2 days of sharing and connecting with the Rooftoppers and in the process...God moves in our spirit and our hearts, He removes the uncertainty and brings His peace. In fact, during our debrief on the flight home I asked Julie the following question, "If we were to move to St. Louis for no particular reason and you had to pick any church that you wanted to attend and join, what church would you pick?" She said, "Rooftop" and I agreed. Even as lay people, we would want to attend Rooftop for so many reasons...so it is settled. A week later, after talking to their leaders and getting the necessary feedback, they offer us their open pastoral position. Honored and with great enthusiasm, we accept the offer and agree to join the Rooftop family.
I will talk about the steps in the postings to come, if for nothing else but to journey through them in my own mind and heart. My prayer therein is to see God's ultimate glory revealed, to strengthen the validity and appeal of trying to live out a truly biblical Christianity (the contrarian way), and to invite others to step out on the narrow path which God is calling all of His children to traverse.
As far as today, March 21st, 2009, exactly eleven years since I was discharged from the United States Marine Corps, we have a church home and a new community of Jesus followers to love and learn to love more deeply, to serve and learn to serve more selflessly, to rejoice with and to rejoice with all the more, to mourn with and to (Lord willing) share our souls with through the trials and suffering that comes to all who dare to follow Jesus and walk TOGETHER on the narrow path...
This journey has been a long and challenging one. 28 months ago I would have had absolutely no idea that God would lead where we have ultimately followed. He truly is the Shepherd, leading his sheep, at least those of His sheep who are willing to humbly trust Him and follow Him, even over dangerous paths and through difficult terrain they would otherwise not want to travel.
The journey to Rooftop alone has been an adventure unto itself, beginning late into the night of October 21st, 2008 after Julie and I were brought to our knees beside our bed in repentance and prayer, experiencing the conviction of our sins and of our self-centered living over the many years prior. In the hour after that time, when I couldn't sleep, the posting for Rooftop first came up on the "ministry position" website I was checking most often at that time. There is much more to that story, which will have to wait for the time being. First, let's take a step back to see where God has led...
Sept 2006 - Express our differing ministry views with previous church employer; mutually agree it is time to part ways.
November 2006 - Leave our church and ministry of 5 years with a grateful heart and hopefully in a fashion that honored them and God.
Winter 2007 - Take a break, visit Utah with family, go to seminary full time for a semester, and get ready for mission trip to Zimbabwe.
April 2007 - Travel with Julie and no kids to Zimbabwe with an openness to serving in Africa full time.
June 2007 - Travel back to Africa with an openness to serving in Africa full time.
July 2007 - Africa is not God's plan at this time, but sense His clear movement in a different direction...south to Indiana.
Summer 2007 - Make plans to move our family to a new "niche" housing development/community.
November 2007 - County in Indiana abruptly and surprisingly rejects previously approved housing plans...housing market crashes 6 months later along with our Indiana plans.
January 2008 - Not sure where to go next, yet continuing to trust God, we began looking for church ministry positions again.
Jan-Nov 2008 -Submitted resumes to over 40 different churches, advanced to final round of interviews numerous times, one of final two candidates several times...yet no offers.
December 2008 - I am freed from the "need" for a church ministry position (which I felt at times) and Julie and I decide to stop pursuing them for our vocation.
January 2009 - Begin making plans for life as lay leader in the church and get excited realizing our best and most fulfilling ministry happened as lay leaders at Kensington Community Church.
February 2009 - Rooftop invites us for interview much to our surprise; we excitedly come and interview, preach in their Sunday service "my message" , and although we enjoyed our weekend, we leave with no assurance or inclination yet of God leading us to Rooftop.
March 2009 - After expressing our uncertainty, Julie and I are invited back to visit Rooftop a second time. This second visit, we stay in a Rooftoppers home for two nights, skip the rental car and are chauffeured wherever we need to go, have a very enjoyable 2 days of sharing and connecting with the Rooftoppers and in the process...God moves in our spirit and our hearts, He removes the uncertainty and brings His peace. In fact, during our debrief on the flight home I asked Julie the following question, "If we were to move to St. Louis for no particular reason and you had to pick any church that you wanted to attend and join, what church would you pick?" She said, "Rooftop" and I agreed. Even as lay people, we would want to attend Rooftop for so many reasons...so it is settled. A week later, after talking to their leaders and getting the necessary feedback, they offer us their open pastoral position. Honored and with great enthusiasm, we accept the offer and agree to join the Rooftop family.
I will talk about the steps in the postings to come, if for nothing else but to journey through them in my own mind and heart. My prayer therein is to see God's ultimate glory revealed, to strengthen the validity and appeal of trying to live out a truly biblical Christianity (the contrarian way), and to invite others to step out on the narrow path which God is calling all of His children to traverse.
As far as today, March 21st, 2009, exactly eleven years since I was discharged from the United States Marine Corps, we have a church home and a new community of Jesus followers to love and learn to love more deeply, to serve and learn to serve more selflessly, to rejoice with and to rejoice with all the more, to mourn with and to (Lord willing) share our souls with through the trials and suffering that comes to all who dare to follow Jesus and walk TOGETHER on the narrow path...
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