Moving Day

It is 11:30 pm, I am exhausted and should be sleeping, and yet...I am sitting in a van outside our local coffee shop where I can still get internet access since our modem was accidently paced up and is in a small box somewhere in our 27 foot trailer of stuff. Selah is with me since she was having a hard time sleeping and keeping Julie and I awake as we tried to sleep on our one remaining matress in the middle of our dining room. I want to write more and I will this week...there is so much to refelct on:



-leaving the home we have spent almost 8 years in and all that house has meant and been to us

-leaving our dear friends and neighbors who are WONDERFUL and such a blessing to us and our family

-excited about moving to St. Louis and beginning our life and ministry there with the Rooftoppers


Tomorrow we begin our journey south. Two nights at a friends cottage in Grand Junction, an hour south of Grand Rapids. Wednesday morning we drive to St. Louis and stay the night somewhere (to be determined), and Thursday we hope our stuff is delivered to our new home as we unload it and begin life in St. Louis.

P.S. For those of you following along I apologize for infrequent posts lately. We have been very busy and I do not know how often we will have internet access this next week. I hope this catches you up and I look forward to sharing more soon.

Life in the Village

The Zilkie family is in its final week at our home after almost 8 years of living here in Caledonia, Michigan. Julie and I closed on this home on September 21st, 2001 and drove our Ryder truck here with all of our stuff on Saturday, September 29th. When we moved in we were 9 months married and Julie had just found out she was pregnant with David a week earlier. Evidently babies and moving are the norm for us. This cute little 100 year old home has been very good to us.

We have brought home 5 newborn babies into this home as Julie and I learned how to be parents and adjusted to their presence in our lives and their accumulative needs. We have had many of our friends over to this home many times, being blessed by Julie's hospitality and culinary skills in the dessert genre. Rare will we Zilkies have dessert unless we are having company so of course I love to have people over!

We birthed our primary ministry at Kentwood Community in this house, inviting the attendees over to our home in the early years and, as the ministry grew, we held monthly meetings in our home for the ministry leaders. In addition, we often invited members of our ministry over just to enjoy spending time together, share a meal together, and invite our young children into our social life and world. For a period there in 04 and 05 we played many a game of Settlers of Catan here in our home. Honestly we were quite obsessive, packing up our two kids in the evening and switching host homes among the couples we were playing with.

We have grown in friendship with our neighbors across the street. It has been neat to watch their family grow, as they brought home Sophia from Korea to be their daughter just over two years ago. It has been such a blessing to have neighbors that share our passionate faith for Jesus. Julie and Brenda really connected over the years, and Julie will miss her dearly. She is one of the kindest, most generous women we know. And our boys will have to find new friends, and Sam especially has set the bar high for them in this area! We saw Mr. Fischer sadly and graciously watch his wife go home to be with the Lord. We often sent our kids over to be with Mrs. Stack during the day, giving Julie a welcome break. I have enjoyed our conversations with Dave over the years and it has been incredible to see their miracle son Luke be born at 24 weeks last year and now is a fully healthy 15 month old boy. We watched the Butlers next door celebrate anniversaries 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, and 63 now well into their 80s...and still going. Old Ollie always has a story to tell and it has been a privilege to listen to him and laugh with him as he remembers his younger years. He was a Marine who served on a spy/recon plane in the Pacific in World War II and they are still so proud of the service they gave to our country. Being a Marine myself, it is always a pleasure to hear his stories, no matter how many times I may have heard them before.

Conversely, the house on our other side has seen much more different activity as sweet Mary our elderly neighbor when we moved in, lost her second husband shortly after we arrived. After that the Gunns move in with their young family only to move out in turmoil 2 1/2 years later. Forclosed, the house stood vacant for almost 3 years until a bright young man and wonderful neighbor Cody moved in last summer and has been returning the home to its previous glory.

Several years ago we hosted a neighborhood party and met our wonderful friends the Baezs. We have enjoyed a neat friendship with them these past several years and will miss them and especially Rick's laid back and humorous ways. Julie and Shamra teamed together for the past two years to plant a garden, of which we greatly enjoyed the bountiful harvest they received for their work. I know Julie was so blessed to have someone who would "mentor" her in gardening as it seemed rather daunting to her at first.

And we can't forget our local librarians! Boy, do we have some great history with them. I'm specifically thinking of the time Julie checked out a book titled, "Marriage to a Difficult Man" and then sent me to pick it up. It was truly the autobiography of Jonathan and Elizabeth Edwards, and Julie was reading it upon recommendation and had no idea of the actual title of the book. However, it created quite the stir at the library as you can imagine!! Julie was so blessed by her friendship with the ladies at the library, where they supplied her countless "Tuesday evening chats", knitting tips, fresh farm eggs, and just good conversations. They will be so missed!

Julie and I have taken many, many walks with our growing family around our village neighborhood, contemplating the challenges and opportunities of life. We would talk and pray and discuss whatever was before us and feel unified and at peace once we came to a collective decision. I have fought the war against the moles in my back yard steadfastly, even courageuosly, but to no avail...I lost. I leave humbled, knowing that the ugly, "bat without wings"looking creatures bested me time and again.

Now in our final week in our home, we are thankful for the many years, many blessings, and great friends God has blessed us with during our time here in Caledonia. During my trip to St. Louis last week we found a home to live in temporarily as we move there next week. I pray that our time in that home and the one to follow will be as meaningful and special as the years we have lived here in this home, among these great and wonderful people.

Friday Morning, 5 a.m.

It is Friday morning at 5am and I am hitting the road right on time. 8 hours of driving while gaining an hour crossing the time zone should put me at the Rooftop Church Building right around noon...we'll see. I have an appointment to see one rental at 1:30pm this afternoon and Julie is going to try to come up with another one or two this morning while I am on the road. Some Rooftoppers have been helping us with some leads. Hard to find 3 month rentals. Everyone wants 6 and mostly 12 months for a rental...See you in St. Louie

Weekend in St. Louis - 12 Days...

It is Wednesday and I am getting ready to hit the road to St. Louis early on Friday morning. I am driving down to drop off our car, look for a home to rent for several months, and take care of some business at Rooftop. I also plan on attending a cool Trivia Night event that the church is hosting on Friday evening, and then fly back to Grand Rapids on Saturday evening. As I have noted previously, our transition to Rooftop has gone quite well with the home selling in 4 days, Selah being born nearly weeks earlier than her due date of 4/21, and a bunch of other stuff that has been very complimentary to a quick and smooth transition to St. Louis.

Well, in the past 24 hours our two best leads for a home to rent are looking less probable as one reported a serious interest in purchasing their home and the other telling us of a long term rental inquiry which would be much better for them as well. We understand and are happy for these former Rooftoppers and their recent good fortune. The Zilkies however are still looking for a place to stay...

We are leaving our home in Caledonia on Monday (4/27) 12 days from today. We will live out of suitcases while staying locally at a friends cottage for a couple of days and then driving together to St. Louis on Wednesday (4/29) or Thursday (4/30), meeting up with our stuff the end of that week.

This weekend will be a great time as I love road trips, am thrilled to get to spend more time with our new church community, and the challenge of finding a short term rental house in a short time is also somewhat exciting. However, I would welcome your prayers for my travels, Julie and the kids as they are without me for a couple of days, and finding the right house in the right location which will help us connect all the more quickly with our new church family as well as keep me close to home during this challenging time of transition. Thank you in advance for your continued prayers and support!!!

He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive

Back in the fall of 1997 when I had around 4 months left in the Marine Corps, my unit sent me and a couple other guys to the Big Island of Hawaii, to the Pohakuloa Training Area (PTA) near the Mauna Kea Summit as the forward party for the larger group that would come later. Honestly, we came over with all the gear and pretty much just sat around for 4 weeks until the rest of the unit came. Expecting as much, I packed my acoustic guitar into the storage bin...just in case. Well, I was right and was able to practice guitar for 6-8 hours a day with no TV, no phone, no computer, no radio to use there. I do remember them serving powdered eggs for breakfast and they would turn green after sitting for while in the warmer. Back to the story...

With nothing else to do, I went to the the small chapel building where I kept my guitar and would constantly play various worship songs and hymns. This is how I learned the guitar, self taught through intense repetition...like 6-8 hours a day on the side of a barren mountain on the big island of Hawaii, with nothing else to do... Then one day several Marines from another unit that had just arrived at PTA walked into the chapel, which had been previously vacant except for me the two weeks prior. These gentlemen were a little older, and one rank higher (Staff Sergeant) as I was a Sergeant at the time and 22 years of age. They were also believers and began joining me in the chapel for prayer, worship, and Bible study as their time permitted. Two of the Marines were African-American and were very outspoken about their faith. More than that, their confidence in Jesus was amazing. For those of you who know me, you know I am a pretty confident and outspoken guy. Yet there was something about these two men and their passion and fearlessness for Jesus which challenged me deeply. Now it is expected that as a Marine you will be all of those things, but for many this bravado gets lost in "Marineland" and doesn't translate well into other parts of life...not so with these guys.

One of the Staff Sergeants saw my passion and fervency and that motivated him all the more. He pushed me in my faith, challenged me in my courage for the gospel, and shared his distinctly different worship style with me during those times in that small chapel building. There was one thing especially he did and said that sticks with me today and is most appropriate today of all days...

A couple times when they would arrive at the chapel for our impromptu worship gatherings he would begin right away saying in his loudest of Marine command voices..."He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive...". At first it is always cool to hear a Marine belt out in their command voice. The sound would boom from his mouth and echo off of the walls of the building. As he would continue, it got a little annoying honestly...as it was unnerving in many ways and I wasn't about to ask him to stop. Then, I began to think about what he was saying"He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..." and the way he was saying it, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..." it began to really have an impact on me.

• Jesus indeed rose from the dead and is fully alive today, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• Not only did He rise from the dead, but He is on the throne of heaven as we speak, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• The fact that He overcame death, means that He conquered it and all of its power in this world, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• His being alive means that He is fully engaged in all that you and I face each day, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• His being alive means that He is presently offering us all of His power, the same power that brought Him back from the dead, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• His being alive means that He is always with me and I am not alone...ever, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• Since He is alive, He desires to be worshipped and glorified in our lives and in everything we do and say, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• His presence and His power is fully available to us if we will accept it by faith and trust it to be so in our lives, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• He will come and judge this world, and we will be held accountable for the lives we lived and what we did with the grace He has lavished on us through His death and resurrection, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• I can and should confidently and passionately proclaim that which is truer than anything else you and I will ever know or see, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."
• Nothing and no one is more worthy of my affections, my focus, and my life than my risen Lord Jesus, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."

I would think these thoughts and more as this Marine would continue repeating over and over. Eventually I would join him in declaring this ultimate truth, and in so doing, be transported from that dingy chapel building to a heavenly place, with a throne room, and an army of angels proclaiming the glory of risen and reigning Jesus Christ mentioned in Isaiah 6:1-8. And for several moments, caught up in the reality of what we were saying, we were in the felt presence of our Lord...all because one man with courage was willing to proclaim what is truer than anything else this world has ever known or seen. For several moments, this world truly did fade away and we caught a glimpse of what heaven is and how different things will be. Moreover, Jesus our Lord conquered death and IS ALIVE, so why should we care or worry what others will think about us when we love, and share of His love with others, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive..."

I pray for you, today, that this Easter Sunday would be special once again. And as we join together and say, "He's Alive, He's Alive, He's Alive," I pray we would also be changed and would dwell in a place of ultimate truth and ultimate reality...a world where Jesus is King, and Lord, and where He is actively ruling and conquering the world in which we live...even if our eyes may not initially see it as so. Be blessed and know that our God is alive today and every day and THAT my friends, should change us...every day.

Africa

This morning a team of people, many of them members of our former ministry "The Calling" left for Zimbabwe on a two week mission trip. Josh White, Emily Buurstra, Tim & DeAnne Nichols, Chris Schmidt, and Andria Ramsey are part of this present team. Josh and Chris were part of the team that Julie and I were on two years ago. In fact, it was two years ago this week Julie and I left on our first mission trip together since getting married in 2000. I had traveled on mission trips previously, but this was our first since getting married. It was a great trip for us in that it opened our eyes up to another world. A world we are still in contact with, supporting in various ways, and praying for as it continues to crumble under the weight of corruption and abuses of power. Zimbabwe is a much different place and a much more difficult place than it was even two years ago.

Zimbabwe Team - April 2007

Just like we did on our trip, this team will host weekend retreats for the youth of the area; they will visit the orphanages and feeding centers Vital Connections continues to sustain and support. The country is so bad that no one uses its currency any more. Rather they trade in Dollars or the neighboring countries currency. Our friends there are suffering and yet I get emails stating that they are pressing on in the midst of all the injustice and difficulty they face each day. Another former member of The Calling wrote a blog of his own about how important our trips are to our dear friends in Zimbabwe even if we don't feel like we are able to so all that much. Know that each of these trips is a cup of cold water to a country dying of thirst...and that my friends is worth whatever price...

Julie's Small Group at Youth Retreat - April 2007

In America we like to fix things, plan and then watch our plans work out, expect effeciency and results, and yet in Africa it is a whole different world. Schedules rarely work, plans always have to be adjusted...it is enough to drive a Westerner crazy. And yet, God loves Africa and the people of Africa. It truly is a different world with a different set of values then ours...some better, some not so. Most importantly though, on this trip there are hundreds of fellow followers of Jesus Christ who will be encouraged, prayed for, built up in their faith, and strengthened in their endurance of life they presently live and have no power to change.

As tumultuous a place as it is, Julie and I love Africa and having visited twice now, I can see that God loves and has richly blessed Africa as a land and people. Maybe this is why they find themselves always in the cross hairs of evil and so much turmoil. If you have a moment or two, pray for this present team, pray for Zimbabwe, and please pray for Africa.

20 Days...

Thank you to everyone who has followed along with Selah's birth and the last couple days. We Zilkies are doing well. Everyone is back home and we are adjusting to life with five wonderful kiddos. Julie has to take it easy and can't use the stairs like normal, but all in all things are going well. The oldest three enjoyed their three days with Grandma Jan and we are all back home as a big ole' family of 7.

It is roughly 20 days until we move with much to do in that time. We will keep you posted and are grateful for your interest, support, and prayers. Some of our dear friends here in Grand Rapids want to have a "Good-Bye Shindig" and are planning it for the afternoon of Saturday, April 25th from 3-5 p.m. in the Byron Lakes Community Center (click on the red link for directions). We would love for any of you available to stop in and see the family, our beautiful new addition (Selah) and give us a chance to say goodbye before leaving. More details will be forthcoming...

Selah Alane Zilkie - 4/4/09

Caroline has a little sister, Selah ("say-la") Alane Zilkie; weighing in at 5lbs 2oz, born at 4:33 on 4/3/09.

A Father's Role in Childbirth

I want to share a couple thoughts about being a part of the birth of my five children. Our society has diminished and marginalized the role of the male in the family for many years. I have felt this "discrimination" for lack of a better term in my almost 8 years of being a father. I usually extend grace when it happens, and sometimes I will even speak up and defend the role and responsibility of a father who dearly loves his wife and children and wants God's best for them. However, it is in childbirth where my role as husband and father is most marginalized. Julie is amazing and is a WARRIOR, delivering 5 children with 4 of them naturally because that is where God has led us in our journey with Him concerning her pregnancy and caring for our unborn children. (Caroline was breech and high risk because of a car accident during Julie's pregnancy with her and ended up having a c-section.) Julie is phenomenal and amazes not just me, but every set of doctors and nurses who gets the privilege of watching her and walking with her through each subsequent delivery.

That being said, I love it when I meet a husband and father who wants to be present with his wife in delivery, and not just present but informed and engaged, fighting with her and for her through this most difficult of events in a woman's life. I love going through labor with my wife and partner in this life. I have to be on my game: always positive, always encouraging, caring for her needs and desires. I try to ask informed questions of the hospital staff who so quickly run over a husbands thoughts or feelings, making sure they are considering what is best for mom and the baby and not just what is easiest or most convenient for them. Also, the fear of litigation in our "sue happy society" hangs over their heads constantly and clouds everything they do, not always to the benefit or comfort of the mother and child. Moreover, childbirth is not a sickness that needs to be fixed like every other reason people go to the hospital. It is about welcoming a young life into this world through the age old initiation process of birth. It is hard, is messy, it is unpredictable, it is exhausting, and then it is exhilarating with no two births going exactly the same. Each time I go through this with Julie I feel as if we have been in a fox hole together in some intense battle, fighting hand to hand against the enemy and have come through it victorious and with our bond of love and trust even stronger than before.

She would say that my role and presence with her in labor and delivery is essential and she could not do what she does without me. I don't know what most other dads are doing or not doing and claim ignorance in this area. But it saddens me that some people's initial response to my passion for this and for my role in this process is to diminish and demean. I am a stand up guy, and I will always encourage husbands, fathers, brothers, and sons to get in "the fight" and to battle for and with those whom God has entrusted into their care. I have been through 5 huge childbirth battles with Julie and she bears the scars from the wounds of the battle. But, she knows that I will fight for her and with her to the end. I hope that the trust that I have built with her and continue to build, will allow and encourage her to continue to live in peace and to follow even more fervently after that which God has laid on her heart and is calling her to.

If you are ever tempted to do so, please try to catch yourself and don't diminish our role as husbands and fathers. In so doing, we only continue to perpetuate the sickness which has infected young men and boys with each passing generation who hear this garbage and end up fulfilling it themselves. Ironically, their withdrawal ends up hurting each forthcoming generation of young women, our daughters, who would love a man in their life who would jump in and defend and fight for them in whatever way possible and as God may lead a man to do so. This night, I sleep in peace. Our oldest three are staying with Grandma Jan for a couple days and I am watching our little Zeke at home and loving it. Julie is being pampered this evening in the hospital by the caring staff and I shall see her and my Sweet Little Selah again in the morning.

Evening Update (about the labor & baby)

It was the weekend of Feb 6-8 in 2004 and our church had scheduled a weekend retreat with another church out on Lake Michigan at a retreat center there. Julie was 38 weeks pregnant, but I was only an hour away and everything would be fine should she go into labor. The night we got there, Friday, I was up late playing cards and hanging out with a bunch of the attendees. I finally stroll off to bed at around 1 a.m. on Saturday morning. Julie had told me to keep my phone on and with me should something happen. Unfortunately when getting ready for bed that night my phone got covered with the clothes I had just changed out of. That evening around 2 a.m. Julie went into labor. The retreat service desk was closed until 6 a.m. the next morning and after two attempts to call me Julie became seriously worried. On her third try I amazingly heard my phone, under a pile of clothes, after 90 minutes of sleep. Needless to say, I was so glad to get home in time for my son Jonathan to be born at 7 a.m. at St. Mary's hospital here in Grand Rapids. I am certain that I had a little help waking up that evening. Who wakes up after 90 minutes of sleep to a very faint noise? I would have otherwise missed my son's birth.

8:49 - Julie's water broke around 4 p.m. this afternoon. We need the labor to continue to progress along as infection begins to become a risk after 18-24 hours of labor. We pray for continued progression and also wisdom to know when to go in to the hospital. If you go in too early, they often suggest all kinds of intervention which does not always help in the natural delivery method which is our desire.

10:07 p.m. - A warm shower, praying with the boys for Mama and the baby, some quiet time laying and relaxing on the bed...it's showtime. The contractions are starting to come and we are headed into the hospital. Thanks for your prayers I will update when I can.

Her Water Just Broke...

At 3:20 p.m. on April 2nd while bending over to help one of our kids tie their shoe, Julie's water broke. I talked with her on the phone from work and her contractions have not yet started so we will try to keep you posted up until we go to the hospital. This is the first time in 5 kids where the water broke before the contractions started (just in case you cared). We will post updates and pictures as we get them so check back often. We would appreciate your prayers!

4:45 p.m. - All the necessary calls have been made. Julie "threw together" some baked oatmeal for breakfast for tomorrow morning....my wife :-) Grandma Jan is coming tomorrow morning and Amy Thomas is coming tonight to watch the kids and stay with them until Grandma arrives. Our little troop Zilkie gathered around with hands held (minus Zeke who was napping) and we prayed for the evening and morning ahead....still no contractions but more water...

5:59 p.m. - While enjoying the wonderful salmon burgers and finishing dinner, Julie has her first contraction and we call Amy to come watch the kids for the evening. We will hang low, watch the contractions, and wait for the right time to head into the hospital.

6:43 p.m. - We had this expression in the Marines, "hurry up and wait". Well that is where we are at presently. The contractions are coming but far apart and light. We will go for a walk which has helped progress the process in the past. In fact, we walked 2 miles to the video store and back on May 14th, 2002 to rent Ocean's 11, the night before David was born at 6 a.m. on May 15th. The kids will stay with Amy and we will bring Zeke along as he is getting a little uptight this evening...he has a RUDE awakening coming in the next couple days. :-)

7:57 p.m. - Julie just called a friend who is very experienced with deliveries and especially the natural type. She got some good counsel and definitely felt better about the evening ahead. Although Julie does the hard work, one thing I have learned is the propensity for the laboring mother to increase in her worry and anxiety. Subsequently, I am constantly affirming her and reminding her that she has done this so well four times previously. Our walk was fun, we visited with a couple neighbors, had a couple more contractions and are back home planning the next several hours.